If you happen to visit my home without prior notice, particularly during daytime hours when my partner is still at work, here’s what you can expect from both me and my living environment. Consider this a friendly warning—it might be the last time you choose to stop by.
- I likely haven’t had the chance to shower. Sure, I may have freshened up yesterday, but today? Not so much. Keep your distance.
- My unkempt hair will likely be piled atop my head in a messy clump, so greasy that it defies gravity without a hair tie. My toddler sometimes mimics me, placing a shiny toy on his head and exclaiming, “I’m Mama!” It’s amusing, I suppose.
- I’ll probably have my arms crossed defensively over my chest since I won’t be wearing a bra. Alternatively, I might be strategically holding a child in front of me, only to dash to my room to remedy the situation as soon as you arrive.
- Expect to see the telltale dark circles under my eyes, a clear indicator of my exhaustion, especially since I won’t have the energy for makeup.
- Toys will be strewn about the house in a chaotic fashion.
- The air will carry a distinctive mix of dirty diapers and apple cinnamon air freshener. You might arrive just after a particularly messy diaper change, or I could be on the hunt for pee because my little one has had an “accident” in a hideaway. This is one of the less delightful aspects of parenting. Apologies in advance; it’s unpleasant for both of us.
- The floor will likely have a sticky residue—thank you, toddlers.
- There’s a high chance someone will be in tears, and it could very well be me.
- My children will likely cling to you as if you’re a rare visitor from another planet.
- A meal will probably be simmering away in my slow cooker, as it has become essential for our survival.
- It’s highly likely there’s a load of laundry languishing in the washer, which I have repeatedly re-washed over the past few days. This is a constant source of frustration for me; it seems like I’m always doing laundry.
- You might also notice a pile of laundry on the couch, which has been re-folded at least once daily for the past three days—again, thanks to toddlers.
- Seating will be an issue, as the couch will either be occupied with unfolded laundry or bouncing children yelling “Cannon ball!”
- I’ll likely insist that my kids show you their latest accomplishments. I take great pride in their growth and will expect you to feign enthusiasm as well.
- While I might feel a bit embarrassed initially, I’ll genuinely appreciate your company. It’s nice to have a conversation with someone who’s at eye level with me.
- If you bring coffee—specifically an iced raspberry white mocha—I will be even more thrilled to see you.
- There’s a chance I might leave you briefly with my kids, promising to return shortly. And when I do, I’ll have fresh, clean hair, moisturized skin, and a revitalized outlook on life.
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In summary, unexpected visits can be quite revealing and chaotic, showcasing the reality of life with young children. You may encounter a messy home, tired parents, and a flurry of activity, but amidst the disorder, there’s a sense of joy and pride in the little moments.
Keyphrase: what to expect when dropping by unexpectedly
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