“Dinner is served,” I call out, placing a steaming homemade lasagna on the kitchen table. A minute ticks by, then another. There’s silence. I don’t hear any footsteps approaching. After half a minute, I raise my voice again.
“Guys! Dinner time!” A couple of moments later, my children come trudging in, bumping into one another and dragging their chairs across the floor.
“I don’t want lasagna,” one of them says, wrinkling her nose.
“Is this spinach? I’m so over spinach,” another complains.
“I want chocolate milk!” the youngest hollers.
I suppress an eye roll and let out a theatrical sigh. Then my oldest pipes up, “Mom, why did you even want kids? We’re loud, annoying, complain all the time, and we fight every day.” She forgot to mention that I rarely get to use the restroom, eat, or dress in peace, along with the endless carpools and school lunches I prepare.
“So why did you decide to have us?” she asks again.
I flash back to my 30-year-old, recently engaged self. My husband and I were blissfully in love but never discussed the future of having children. It wasn’t that I didn’t want kids; I just hadn’t given it much thought. For me, motherhood felt like the natural next step. Nine months after our honeymoon, I was pregnant.
Twelve years later, I can’t pinpoint the exact reason I chose to have kids, but I can confidently say that I’m glad I did. Despite the challenges, the remarkable moments far outweigh the difficulties. Here are some reasons why I cherish being a parent:
1. Unmatched Joy
My three daughters certainly test my patience, but they also fill my heart with a joy I never knew existed. This warmth can hit me at any moment—when my oldest sings beautifully at her recital, when my preschooler proudly shows off her carefully drawn letter “L,” or when my 10-year-old suddenly hugs me and declares, “I love you, Mommy!” These moments of bliss are truly indescribable and make every struggle worthwhile.
2. Embracing the Moment
My youngest is a master of living in the present. She doesn’t dwell on the past or fret about the future, and this simple approach to life brings her happiness. I’ve realized that when I take a break from my hectic schedule and engage in her world—like building a doghouse out of foam blocks—I find joy in the moment, too.
3. Leadership Skills
As a parent, I’m responsible for the safety, health, and well-being of three growing individuals. I’m their go-to source for comfort after falls, guidance on friendships, and support for creative projects. I set bedtimes and meal plans, and I make crucial decisions on a daily basis. This kind of leadership has fostered confidence in me that I never knew I had.
4. Learning Through Mistakes
As a perfectionist before having kids, I’ve learned that parenting is not about avoiding mistakes. Tempers will flare, bedtimes will be missed, and sometimes it’s cereal for dinner. Unless you’re a magical figure like Mary Poppins (who was actually a nanny), parenting is all about navigating through trial and error and learning as we progress.
5. Increased Gratitude
While I’m thankful for the significant aspects of life—my health, shelter, and food—having children has deepened my appreciation for the ordinary. Simple joys like when a fever finally breaks, the rain stops for outdoor play, or my kids cooperate to build a Lego Eiffel Tower fill my heart with gratitude.
6. Humor in Chaos
Kids can be downright hilarious. Just the other day, my youngest was whining about hunger. I replied, “Sorry, sweetie, I don’t have any snacks, so you’ll just have to wait until we get home.” That’s when my middle child chimed in, “Yeah, mom’s not dealing with you. Been there, raised that!” Laughter is a wonderful remedy that lightens the load of everyday parenting struggles.
Of course, there are days when I contemplate life without my children. However, I never get too far into that thought because there’s usually a child asking for a snack, sharing a story, or wrapping their arms around me for no reason at all.
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In summary, the joys of parenting are profound and transformative, despite the challenges that come with it. The laughter, moments of connection, and leadership opportunities shape both my children and me into the individuals we are meant to be.
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