What is it about you that constantly drifts into thoughts of failure or regret over commitments, often feeling as if it’s entirely beyond your control? It’s important to remember that you shouldn’t be too harsh on yourself. This is a common experience.
But maybe not everyone thinks this way. You often find yourself believing that others are just as flawed as you, yet only you possess the honesty to confront these truths. However, it’s crucial to recognize that others are likely not as flawed as you might perceive yourself to be. In fact, it could be argued that you might be your own harshest critic, which is why you feel compelled to engage in meditation for two and a half hours.
You really don’t have to attend. No one is judging your efforts. It’s frustrating that some individuals in the meditation community cling to the notion that they can redeem themselves through practices like meditation while also pretending to have a deeper understanding of life. You are not superior to anyone else.
Remember, you don’t have to be so critical of yourself.
But if you let go of that criticism, how will you improve?
That’s a valid point.
You’re not wearing a supportive garment. Does choosing to forgo it somehow pay homage to the sacred aspects of the universe?
Oh no, that parking job is less than ideal. Is that person beside you laughing? Oh wait, it’s just someone indifferent.
Why do these dedicated individuals insist on starting with exercises? They should have someone more relaxed, like you, leading these sessions.
Just take your time arranging your blanket and mat; then you can opt out of this. Rolling your neck isn’t too difficult. You can manage that.
Everyone else seems to have closed their eyes. You can stop worrying now.
Ek Ong Kar. Sat Nam. Siri. Wahe Guru.
How long has it been? How many seconds are in one repetition of the mantra? If you calculate that, you can count and make the experience less tedious. Focus on this for about thirty minutes, then you can lie down.
Oh, two individuals are already lying down. You can join them! Oh, wait—those are children. You can’t be the only adult lying down.
About thirty minutes have passed. You could lie down for the next forty minutes and then rise for the final stretch. No, you can’t do that.
You might just get away with it.
Wow, you seem to have been asleep for a considerable time. You can take a bathroom break now. Wait, is it 6:45? We’re nearing the end! You could sneak a bathroom visit, recite Ek Ong Kar. Sat Nam. Siri. Wahe Guru a few more times, and then be home in no time. That’s incredible.
Stare at the clock intently; your exhaustion might be clouding your perception. No, it’s definitely 6:45. This is fantastic. You weren’t fully aware during the meditation, but that’s alright. Remarkably, you didn’t scold yourself for being unproductive. Is this a sign of progress? Did the meditation already benefit you?
Okay, at least 15 minutes have passed. What’s the hold-up with these people? Are they planning to keep you here indefinitely? You could lie down again, chant “Ek Ong Kar. Sat Nam. Siri. Wahe Guru” ten more times, and that should wrap it up. You must be correct; you checked the time yourself. You might just be misjudging how slow time is moving.
Someone else is arriving. Oh, it’s Angela. She mentioned coming around 6:15, but could it really be that time? No, it can’t be. She must have miscalculated her arrival. Don’t look at the clock!
Wait, it really is 6:15.
Get back to chanting; you can do this. Yes, great job.
Finally, another adult has laid down. Oh no, she’s expecting. Of course, they get all the breaks. You have to remain seated. You can just lie down for a brief moment, but then it’s back to chanting. Keep at it; it’s not so bad if you persist.
Just rest for five minutes, then you can get up.
Did she just announce “last one”? Sit up quickly. Maybe no one will realize you’ve been lying down the whole time.
“Ek Ong Kar. Sat Nam. Siri. Wahe Guru.” You’ve completed it.
You didn’t achieve much; you spent most of the time asleep.
Leave me alone; at least you showed up.
Is that enough? Just being present?
That will have to do because that’s usually all you manage.
Fair enough.
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In summary, the internal monologue experienced during meditation often reflects a blend of self-criticism, distraction, and an underlying desire for improvement. Engaging in meditation can reveal our thoughts and feelings, serving as a reminder of our humanity and the importance of self-acceptance.
Keyphrase: inner monologue during meditation
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