My Child with HIV is Playing with Your Child

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My child, who is living with HIV, is engaging with your child, and you may not even be aware of it. She has interacted with your child at a private preschool, shared laughter during swim lessons, and stood behind your child in gymnastics class. Due to legal protections, we are not obligated to disclose her HIV-positive status to schools, camps, or other parents—only to healthcare professionals.

The stigma surrounding HIV has led to significant advocacy for the right to keep such information private. Our adoption social worker advised us, “Keep this to yourself. There is a lot of stigma and misunderstanding out there. Your child will already stand out in the community; do you want to give others another reason to judge her?”

Recently, during kindergarten, my daughter attempted to explain her condition to a classmate. “Sophie, guess what? I have a dragon in my blood! I was born with it, and my birth mom had it, too. When I take my medicine, the dragon stays asleep.” Unfortunately, Sophie and several other friends didn’t comprehend her words. One child even claimed, “Well, I was born in China and I have a dragon too!” It’s a common misunderstanding among children. I reassured my daughter that they simply didn’t understand yet.

So, why is there no requirement to inform schools or childcare providers? The reality is that HIV transmission has never occurred in these settings. Thanks to modern antiretroviral medications, the virus is effectively rendered inactive. Every four months, my child undergoes blood tests, and the results consistently show no detectable virus in her system. She is thriving—healthy, joyful, and full of life. I treat her minor injuries, share meals, and attend to her needs without any concern for transmitting HIV.

It’s important to understand that my daughter was born with HIV; had her birth mother been able to access effective medications during pregnancy, my child could have been free of the virus. In China, where these medications are provided at no cost, many HIV-positive individuals hesitate to take them due to the fear of social rejection. Admitting an HIV positive status can lead to being ostracized from loved ones.

In the future, my daughter might date your son, marry, and even have children who are HIV-negative. Fellow parents, it is crucial to realize that HIV should not be a source of fear. I encourage you to seek information online, consult your pediatrician, and educate yourselves about the realities of HIV. Knowledge is power, and it can help dispel the myths that lead to stigma. My HIV-positive daughter plays with your child, and you may not even know which one she is, and that is perfectly fine.

HIV itself is not frightening; ignorance and stigma are the true concerns.

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In summary, understanding HIV is essential to combatting stigma and fostering acceptance. It is vital to educate ourselves and support all children, regardless of their health status.

Keyphrase: HIV awareness in children

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