DING! It’s difficult to discern which notification just chimed in on my phone, drowned out by the sounds of a lively cartoon and the tapping of my fingers against the keyboard. What I do know is that my to-do list is overflowing, and I only have time to tackle a fraction of it before the evening bus arrives with my 12 and 13-year-olds. After that, it’s a whirlwind of homework, dinner prep, bath time, and bedtime, all while navigating the inevitable sibling disputes that arise. If luck is on my side, I might even manage to enjoy a warm meal and receive a quick hug or kiss from my partner when he gets home from work.
“Mommy, do you need to check your emails?” chirps my curious four-year-old, his eyes wide with innocence. God bless him. He likely understands the notifications on my iPhone better than any adult I know. If only he could help me respond to them!
When I made the choice to work from home, I genuinely believed it was the best decision I could ever make. “What’s not to love?” I told myself three years ago. I could pursue a fulfilling career, earn a paycheck, be present for my little ones, set my own schedule, and keep my professional skills sharp while cherishing every precious moment with my children. It seemed like the ideal solution!
Let me be clear: working from home is incredibly rewarding, and I wouldn’t trade this experience for anything. I am fortunate to have a job I adore, kids I cherish, and a life I find fulfilling. However, it’s not without its challenges.
The main hurdle? I work from home while caring for a four-year-old. For anyone who has spent time with toddlers or preschoolers while attempting to focus on work, that statement speaks volumes.
In the beginning, I tried to establish a home office in a spare bedroom, believing it would create a distraction-free zone away from the television and the kids. I was convinced that this would lead to increased productivity. However, that arrangement lasted only about a month. No matter how hard I tried, I couldn’t manage to carve out more than half an hour without being pulled away by something that needed my attention. It became clear that I couldn’t leave my toddler unattended for longer periods. My plan was to work during his naptime or while he played. Spoiler alert: naps don’t last forever, and neither do solitary play sessions. There’s only so much screen time I’m comfortable allowing, so I adjusted my strategy. I began to work sporadically throughout the day while also engaging with my child and tackling household tasks, saving substantial work for the evenings after the kids were in bed.
Fast forward to now, and I haven’t had a solid encounter with my pillow before 2 or 3 a.m. in over a year—often it’s closer to 4 a.m., and sometimes I’m still awake as dawn breaks. My life runs on caffeine, nicotine, and cloud storage. I can’t recall the last time I devoted any significant amount of time to sleep, as my husband has to wake early for his “real” job. We do hire sitters and occasionally enjoy date nights, but I deeply miss the simple pleasure of going to bed together. It feels lonely to wake up alone while everyone else is preparing for their day.
Let’s not forget the well-meaning friends, family, and neighbors who equate working from home with having endless free time. Here are a few gems I often hear:
- “What do you do all day?”
- “Why are you up so late?”
- “Can’t you just do that tomorrow?”
- “If I were home all day, my house would be spotless!”
- “I wish I could sleep as late as I wanted!”
- “Must be nice to work in your pajamas!”
I’ll concede that last point—working in my pajamas does have its perks. When my kids ask why I’m dressed up for a video call, I explain that I want to make a good impression on my boss, avoiding the ‘before’ look of a makeover show.
Working from home is not synonymous with lounging around while drawing a salary. To earn money, I must produce actual work, just like anyone in a traditional office. I complete real tasks that require genuine effort and time. The absence of a commute doesn’t diminish my productivity, and my unconventional hours don’t negate my contributions to society.
While it may seem like the perfect arrangement, I often feel as though I’m not excelling in any area. I struggle to fully engage with my child because of work demands, and I can’t devote myself to my job because my child needs attention. Then there are household tasks to address, like responding to the dryer’s alert for clean towels before bath time. I find myself constantly on the clock, feeling as though I’m shortchanging something in this chaotic life. Yet, despite the turmoil, I wouldn’t want it any other way. I thrive in this chaos and can’t imagine what I’d do with real downtime.
Oh, wait. Yes, I would. It’s called sleep—something I vaguely remember. It’s the elusive state that feels like heaven and tastes like cotton candy. I’ll get to that someday, but for now, it’s almost sunrise—time to wake everyone up for work and school, prepare breakfast, and throw in some laundry before I head to bed.
In summary, while working from home presents its unique challenges, the rewards of flexibility and presence in my children’s lives make it worthwhile. Balancing work and family is a complex dance, but it’s a rhythm I’ve come to embrace.
Keyphrase: The Realities of Working from Home
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