Transitioning into motherhood brings profound changes—many of which are unexpected and often underestimated. Here are ten significant differences that arise before and after welcoming a child into your life.
Cognitive Function
Before Motherhood: My memory was sharp; I could easily navigate from one room to another with clear intentions and articulate thoughts.
After Motherhood: I often enter a room and forget my purpose instantly. I’ve misplaced items in the most unconventional ways—like putting the milk in the pantry. My thoughts become scattered; it’s as if I’ve lost some brain cells along the way.
Preparing to Leave the House
Before Motherhood: I simply grabbed my purse and headed out.
After Motherhood: “Do you have your lunch box, backpack, and homework? Why are your shoes on the wrong feet? Did you brush your teeth? Your shirt is inside out, and we’ll have to skip the hair brushing today. Oh, let me clean that peanut butter off your forehead.”
Sleep Patterns
Before Motherhood: Sleep was mine to control, including the duration and timing.
After Motherhood: I find myself attempting to catch a quick nap while watching children’s shows. Thoughts race through my mind: Is the cleaning supplies cabinet secure? Are crayons within reach? Can a child truly drown in the toilet? Ultimately, sleep becomes a luxury I can hardly afford.
Emotional Stability
Before Motherhood: I maintained emotional composure, often appearing stoic.
After Motherhood: My emotions are a rollercoaster—one moment I’m laughing, and the next, tears flow without warning. The slightest inconvenience, like misplacing the remote during an SPCA commercial, can send me into a spiral.
Evening Routines
Before Motherhood: Dinner was often takeout, followed by a movie on the couch until sleep overtook me.
After Motherhood: I meticulously ensure all food groups are included in our meals, manage bath times, negotiate bedtime stories (just one more, please!), and grant endless goodnight kisses—only to face the challenge of getting them to sleep.
Exposure to Bodily Fluids
Before Motherhood: I found bodily fluids repulsive.
After Motherhood: I’ve become all too familiar with being peed on, pooped on, and even vomited on. Snot has become an accessory to my wardrobe, and I’ve developed expertise in cleaning these messes from the living room rug.
Date Nights
Before Motherhood: Planning a date was effortless.
After Motherhood: It requires a detailed process: contacting multiple babysitters, providing extensive instructions, and returning promptly to adhere to curfews—all while compensating the sitter generously.
Attraction Shifts
Before Motherhood: Romantic gestures like flowers and surprise gifts were the ultimate turn-ons.
After Motherhood: A simple offer from my partner to handle the kids’ baths becomes incredibly attractive. In this new context, it’s a revelation of intimacy.
Intimacy
Before Motherhood: I enjoyed spontaneity in sexual relations.
After Motherhood: I find myself checking if the children are asleep and ensuring the door is locked. Any noise makes me anxious, but exhaustion often wins.
Perceptions of Motherhood
Before Motherhood: I envisioned motherhood as a possibility for my future.
After Motherhood: It dawned on me that I had no concept of the depth of experience and fulfillment this journey would offer.
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In summary, becoming a mother transforms various aspects of life, encompassing cognitive functions, emotional stability, and daily routines. The transition reveals both challenges and profound joys, reshaping how one perceives motherhood and intimacy.
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