Dear Alex,
Yesterday, as I saw you waiting in your driveway for our scheduled pickup, a thought struck me: it has been nearly two years since I last saw you in a state of undress. My expression must have revealed the relief I felt at this realization, and I apologize for claiming that I was distracted by the dog. Truthfully, my mind wandered to more intimate matters.
In the spirit of honesty—something we often struggled with during our marriage—there are a few important sentiments I wish to share with you.
Apologies and Reflections
First and foremost, I want to extend my apologies. I regret that we made a vow of “forever” without truly understanding the depth of that commitment. If blame is to be assigned, it should be directed at the stars—neither of us could have grasped the complexities of a lifetime when we were still so young and inexperienced. We were evolving individuals, unaware that we would eventually drift apart.
Nonetheless, I want to express my gratitude. Thank you for the ring and for sharing your last name with me. Thank you for imparting lessons in resilience and patience. Most importantly, thank you for our children, who carry your likeness in their laughter and smiles. They are truly the greatest gift I have ever received.
I appreciate your courage in fighting for our relationship, as well as your willingness to let go when I expressed my need for freedom.
Lingering Questions
While our Divorce Agreement clearly outlines visitation schedules and financial responsibilities, it leaves many questions unanswered. Every time I see you, unasked queries linger in the air, awkward and heavy.
Some questions may only evoke sadness, bringing us back to tender memories. Do you recall those early nights at home with our daughter, when we marveled at her tiny hands and delicate fingernails, creations of our shared love?
When our wedding song plays on your device, do you skip it, or do you pause to reminisce about that beach weekend and my hair falling across my face? Have you removed that song entirely, fearing it might lead you back to a chapter you’ve closed for good?
I also find myself pondering your current life. Are you in love? Is someone loving you? Is your new partner fulfilling desires that I could not? Has she made you question the authenticity of what we once shared?
Navigating Our New Existence
Then there are the nuances of our new existence. When is it appropriate to embrace you? At the kids’ concerts, after a significant sports win, or at a funeral? Should I offer a comforting touch, or simply acknowledge you from a distance?
Change is inevitable, and I accept that. Our communication has transformed; we are no longer friends on social media, nor do we engage in phone conversations. Instead, we exchange brief text messages, reducing our interactions to acronyms, like teenagers who have forgotten the art of written correspondence.
Letting Go of Anger
Finally, I want to convey that I have let go of my anger. Through therapy and self-reflection, I have learned to release my grievances. Yet, I sense that you still harbor resentment. I can see it in your expressions when we cross paths.
This leads me to one last question: Do you foresee a time when you might forgive me?
With warm regards,
Your Former Spouse